so i was driving back from picking up my friend @ LAX last month and i get pulled over.
I know I wasn't speeding, i am up-to-the-minute legal with insurance, registration, etc so i
wasn't too concerned.
The cop strolled up and said, "know why i stopped you?"
me: "no idea"
him: " you have no front license plate on your vehicle."
and so i take a fix-it ticket and am on my merry way.
i write to my good friend who sold me Ghosty, my beloved little car.
she said that maybe she had the second plate in her garage,
looked a bit, called back, no she couldn't find it.
that's ok, i then went down to the DMV and stood in line for a bit
to get two shiny new plates. i went out in the pouring rain (only on that day did it rain in southern california)
and unscrewed my back license plate to find---viola! the second plate snuggled into the first. I walk back into the DMV, sheepishly hand over the two plates and the lady says, "uh-uh, you bought new ones...we can't void transaction"
so fine, i then go to put the plate on except there is not a place to put it. so i got to the dealership (which i rarely ever do)
and bought for $52, a small bracket, which had i smelt the metal like a blacksmith in the days of old and welded it together myself, may have cost three dollars total...but, i figure ok, they got me. As i am pulling out of the dealership, i hear a whick-whick-whap and then a whappita-whappita-whappita, I pull over and see a HUGE bolt sticking out of my front tire.
ok, i can handle this, i go back to the guy who just charged me fifty plus for the bracket (which i didn't have him put on cause that would be an extra charge) and i point at the tire...say "eh? look what i picked up in your parking lot--what do you suggest?" he said, "sorry, tires plus is down the street."
that's still ok, i am feeling in tune with the universe. I pull into the tire place and ask the guy, can he patch me up?
"oh no, ma'am, this tire is too old to patch.." i said, "fine, fine, two new tires, can i get by on that? "
so they put them on, i get out of there, but before i do, i say," can you put my fifty dollar bracket on? please?"
they do, I fly away.
i go down to get the vehicle sign-off place, and they are closed for Caesar Chavez day. that's ok.
when i go back the next available day, they only charge me $15. to look at it and $10. for court costs...
now the automatic cameras can read the front of my car, in case i am zipping through any red lights...
pay onto caesar, baby. sometimes you just have to pay onto caesar....